What you say? She ain't no diva!

We need an intervention. We have been overusing and abusing the word diva, and we need to stop. Not everyone is a diva, so not everyone should call themselves one. What key ingredients make a diva?

UrbanDictionary.com defines diva as “a bitchy woman that must have her way exactly, or no way at all. Often rude and belittles people, believes that everyone is beneath her and thinks that she is so much more loved than she really is.” Webster defines it as “a usually glamorous and successful performer or personality.”

Whoa. Those two definitions are drastically different . Where did the disconnect come about? When did diva become so bad?

It might have started with Diana Ross. She’s definitely the ultimate diva. It might have continued with Jennifer Lopez. It was reported that the so-so singer/actress wanted her dressing room to be all whie (white flowers, furniture, etc.) She denied this in the September issue of InStyle. But to me, that’s normal. Celebrities make odd requests all the time, but when did we normals start to think we were official divas?

I blame it on Beyonce. In fact, I blame a lot of things on Beyonce — global warming, hangnails, traffic jams, you name it. So, of course, I have to blame diva abuse on Mrs. Carter. She released the song “Diva” from her album I Am… Sasha Fierce. “A diva is a female version of a hustler,” she sang. Has anyone ever actually listened to these lyrics? It’s nonsense, so much so that I thought Lil’ Wayne wrote this gobbledy-gook.

“When he pull up / wanna pop my hood up / bet he better have a six pack in the cooler / Gettin’ money / Divas gettin’ money / If you ain’t gettin’ money then you ain’t got nuttin’ for me.” WTF?! What does it all mean?

In dissecting this mess, it became clear to as to why we are why there is mass confusion over the word. We’re using it all willy nilly in any kind of situation. There are so many instances where it is acceptable to call yourself a diva. Listed below are the times when it is not:

• In the chekout line at the grocery store. Yes, the bagger boy is bagging you groceries. No, he’s not just there for you.
• While waiting in line for the bus. It’s not acceptable at anytime.
• At your kid sister’s recital. That instrumental was not an invitation for you to come on stage and sing.

My BFF, Sheree, think that diva doesn’t have to be so negative. “When you love yourself enough but also not passing judgment on others,” she said, “so that you feel non-threatened by another woman because you love you… Now, that to me is a diva.”

Okay, I think I get it now. If you make diva positive and stop using the word in silly situations, it can make sense again. But until then let’s cease and desist. In diva name, we pray. Amen.