Last night, BET aired Black Girls Rock, an awards show which celebrated the accomplishments of Black women around the globe who inspire us through motivation, entertainment, and good deeds, such as Ruby Dee, Raven-Symone, Reverend Dr. Iyanla Vanzant, and more.

Black Girls Rock was not just an awards show, but it is a nonprofit organization that started in 2006 by Beverly Bond to build the self esteem of young black women, ages 12-17, ages where growth in self-worth and esteem is most important.

Sounds great, right? Well, not to everyone. On Twitter when most of my timeline seemed to praise the efforts made by Black Girls Rock, there were a few naysayers. I’m not saying that everyone has to agree or feel praise as well, but come on, why the need to criticize?

Specifically, there was one tweet that hit a nerve with me. It said (and it’s unedited),

“Hope tht “black girls rock” shit dsnt give u black broads a false sense of empowerment.White grls dnt need a show 2kno they rock.”

Absolutely right. White women do not need a show to let them know they rock. There are a million outlets to let them know they do. There’s countless magazines, TV shows, shrines, you name it, to let them know they rock every single day.

Are we not allowed to feel empowered? What kind of statement is that? If we aren’t proud of our achievements and accomplishments, then who will be?

Imagine, if someone White or otherwise were watching Black Girls Rock they might have learned something new. Maybe they never heard of Teresa Clarke who founded Africa.com to show the world that Africa isn’t all about despair and poverty.

As Black women, everyone already knows, we’re told that we’re not good enough, we can’t play with the boys, or that we simply cannot. We hear about it in songs and with randoms on the street that we’re bitches or we’re this or that.

We need to believe that we are special in every single way, and if it takes an awards show to recognize that feat, then so be it. That comment was proof enough why we need to let the world know why Black girls rock, and that we will always continue to do so.

I rock because I won’t let anyone tell me that I don’t.

From Clutch Magazine  – Sadly, it seems the media rhetoric alleging a ‘Single Black Woman’ crisis is getting under our skin. Black love is under attack. And the most damaging part about it all is, many of us are the very ones striking fierce blows at what we once dreamt about as little girls. No one ever said it would be easy, attaining the “Cosby Show” with “Good Times” hustle. The very crisis we feel unfolding before us is half hype, half unquantitative numbers. Ask any Black woman, age 50 and over, and they will tell you that what some of are whining about, ain’t nothing new.

But when did we really stop believing in Black men?

Why does our desires to try and a little “Something New” means we have to turn our backs on all that we once knew? Even through their very specific types of bullshit, Black men are apart of us, whether we like it or not.

A damaging piece was written by a writer for Bossip’s new sister site. “8 Reasons to Date a White Man” was posted Monday, and since then, the article has sparked debate, counter-pieces and loads of comments. But we decided, instead of producing our own response, to pass the mic to our brotha, Shane80.

Here at CLUTCH, we’re never giving up on Black men.

1. Gay White men tend to be more forthcoming about their sexuality with family and friends. The down low phenomenon is less prevalent, which preserves the battery usage on your gaydar and relieves the stress of dissecting every male relationship.

Shane: Let’s stop branding Black men as the sole proprietors of down low behavior. This country as whole has problem with integrity and truth telling. Have we forgotten about Ted Haggard, Mark Foley, Larry Craig, Lance Bass, and Roy Ashburn? I guess these men are above reproach. I guess it’s not new millennium enough to ask the pertinent questions about the people we date. It is homophobic and shortsighted of the author to only say that down low behavior is limited to gay relationships when heterosexual men and women engage in devious and hurtful secrecy in relationships. We can cite Bill Clinton, Mark Spector here.

For the remaining eight reasons, visit Clutch Magazine …

The premiere of LaLa’s Full Court Wedding aired last night on VH1, and it seems like a cute show. We see Alani “LaLa” Vasquez prepare for the wedding to Denver Nugget Carmelo Anthony and in the meantime she gets advice from her celebrity friends (Tyrese? O_o).

They’ve been together for a very long time, and their engagement lasted a whopping six years. Six years? It made me think, could I be engaged that long?

I’m very quick to say no. I doubt they got engaged in 2004, and Carmelo said, “How bout a 2010 wedding?” I’m sure there were circumstances which prevented them from getting married sooner (such as the birth of their child Kiyan). But honestly, six years?

I had a Twitter discussion last nite, and some folks believe that there is no reason to rush into marriage. Why get married so soon? The divorce rate is too high to be engaged all willy nilly. Ok, I get it, but does that mean that we should date for God knows how long only to be engage until eternity? I don’t think so.

It seems like nowadays, people are quicker to have childen way before they get married, if they get married. I’m sorry, but I don’t want Junior to be my ring bearer at my wedding. We seem more willing to be a baby mother over being a wife, and, for me, that’s not the move.

I honestly believe that when a man (or woman) wants to propose, they should be ready. Don’t propose just so the other person could be happy and then string them around for years and years with an engagement ring to sport around while it loses its shine. That’s just not fair.

I know there’s no such thing as the perfect engagement and every situation is different, but how long should one wait in between the engagement and wedding?

It was just a couple of months ago that people were up in arms over Miss Willow Smith dressing too grown for her age. Now that he latest single, “Whip My Hair,” was just released, the same adults are sure bumpin’ her song. (And for good reason too: It’s hot!)

Now the nine-year-old has been scooped up by Roc Nation already. She’s already gotten comparisons to Rihanna, Jay-Z’s first muse. I think she has a long career ahead of her, especially with her parents Will and Jada Pinkett Smith by her side, she will be amazing.

If you haven’t heard her song already, listen:

Here’s a couple of female black child singers who made it BIG. There hasn’t been too many in the past decade, but they’re out there! And hopefully it will change since that market is definitely void…

Raven-Symone

We all know she was cute little Olivia from The Cosby Show, but remember her song “That’s What Little Girls are Made Of” back in ’93? Her singing career really started with this. She went on to star in movies (the Doolittle films) as well as her own show on Disney That’s So Raven where she played a psychic teenager living in San Francisco. She also branched out with her own clothing line for Wal-Mart.

Keke Palmer

In order to make it, honestly you have to sing and act. The formula hasn’t changed at all. She got her first leading rold in Akeelah and the Bee, and now Miss Palmer also has her own show on Nickelodeon called True Jackson, VP. She released her first album in 2007, So Uncool

I read a post on Demetria Luca’s blog, A Belle in Brooklyn , yesterday where one of her friends got turned down from a party by the doorman because she looked “regular black.”

Regular black? Yes, regular black. This means that she was “regular” because she had no weave, no flashy clothes, none of that extra I guess. You know, regular. So, for that, she had to hightail it home.

The bouncer was a black man, of course (meaning he probably has a regular black mama). He was the “Chosen One” to select which non-regulars, or exotic beauties, to gain entry into the club.

What else does exotic mean (besides the weave and such)? It means the girl might be light-skinned, have light eyes, possibly Amber Rose or Kim Kardashian looking. It’s not enough that it takes so much for a woman to get ready for a night out on the town. Whether we have a fresh weave or a fresh roller wrap, it takes time. We want to find the perfect outfit just for that evening for us to feel good in. We buy new makeup, maybe get our brows and nails done. A lot of time and effort goes into being a woman.

So when a male, specifically a black male, claims he needs something more exotic or flashy is he just shunning the black woman alltogether?

I’m not entirely sure, but all we see in magazines and TV are the exotic chicks, it’s no wonder why black men want them. It seems like it’s the only thing that is presented. It’s nothing really new. It’s crazy to see the men who want the girl who looks different because chances are, they themselves are regular. How bout this, if you want a girl who is exotic, you better look like an extra from Takers.

One of my best friends and I talk about this pretty frequently. If black men are willing to push us aside for the girl who doesn’t look American, or maybe half American), why do we continue to be so loyal to them?

Why do we allow others to tell us what is beautful or worthy anyway? If you know you’re beautiful and a person says that you’re not, you’re still going to be beautiful. And if that one person thinks you’re not good enough for them, trust, there’s someone out there who does.