I read a post on Demetria Luca’s blog, A Belle in Brooklyn , yesterday where one of her friends got turned down from a party by the doorman because she looked “regular black.”

Regular black? Yes, regular black. This means that she was “regular” because she had no weave, no flashy clothes, none of that extra I guess. You know, regular. So, for that, she had to hightail it home.

The bouncer was a black man, of course (meaning he probably has a regular black mama). He was the “Chosen One” to select which non-regulars, or exotic beauties, to gain entry into the club.

What else does exotic mean (besides the weave and such)? It means the girl might be light-skinned, have light eyes, possibly Amber Rose or Kim Kardashian looking. It’s not enough that it takes so much for a woman to get ready for a night out on the town. Whether we have a fresh weave or a fresh roller wrap, it takes time. We want to find the perfect outfit just for that evening for us to feel good in. We buy new makeup, maybe get our brows and nails done. A lot of time and effort goes into being a woman.

So when a male, specifically a black male, claims he needs something more exotic or flashy is he just shunning the black woman alltogether?

I’m not entirely sure, but all we see in magazines and TV are the exotic chicks, it’s no wonder why black men want them. It seems like it’s the only thing that is presented. It’s nothing really new. It’s crazy to see the men who want the girl who looks different because chances are, they themselves are regular. How bout this, if you want a girl who is exotic, you better look like an extra from Takers.

One of my best friends and I talk about this pretty frequently. If black men are willing to push us aside for the girl who doesn’t look American, or maybe half American), why do we continue to be so loyal to them?

Why do we allow others to tell us what is beautful or worthy anyway? If you know you’re beautiful and a person says that you’re not, you’re still going to be beautiful. And if that one person thinks you’re not good enough for them, trust, there’s someone out there who does.

We all heard about Fantasia and her recent issues of being a mistress and overdosing on aspirin. My heart aches for her story since she’s been through so much. Everyone was happy when she finally received her high school diploma, and then it was bad news after bad news.

I honestly didn’t want to comment on her situation since it’s too tragic. I couldn’t fathom wanting to commit suicide if I had a child.

But then when I try not to comment, said celebrity always snaps me back to reality. In an interview with Vibe, she explains that she was treated unfairly by the media during her scandal because she was dark-skinned.

“I was on Nancy Grace, CNN, every gospel station, and in every magazine and every newspaper,” she said of the scandal. “It was on. You would have thought I was the President or something.

“I’ve battled and have had to deal with that before. Lord forgive me and I don’t want to offend anybody,” she continued, “but when [I did Idol] it seemed like everybody there was Barbied out. Slim, long hair, light eyes, light-skinned. And here I come with my dark skin, full nose, short hair and full lips —it was hard.”

Come on, Taisa! She won Idol, what, five years ago? The comment might have been relevant then, but now not so much. Apparently, Alicia Keys has been given preferential treatment as Homewrecker of the Year because she’s light-skinned. Seriously? Keys definitely had backlash for her alleged affair with Swizz Beatz before she tied the knot with him. The difference between Fantasia and Keys is that Keys stayed quiet and her situation wasn’t as extreme.

Let’s run down the events:

1. August 7 – Reported that Fantasia had a sex tape come out with her married boyfriend Antwuan Cook. Cook’s wife, Paula Cook filed papers with a North Carolina court about the infidelity. According to TMZ, her reps released a statement saying, “Fantasia will weather this storm with the dignity and grace that she has exemplified throughout a life in which she has repeatedly overcome obstacles and challenges. Fantasia’s faith in God, herself and family remain as strong as ever.”

2. August 10 – It was reported that she attempted suicide by overdosing on aspirin and sleeping pills.

3. August 20 – She did a surprise performance at a birthday celebration for Charlotte Bobcats player Tyrus Thomas.“I been in the house for a week so you know I’m bout to act ugly… When they said it was over for me, I’m here to say I’m back!”

4. August 23 – Fantasia admitted the suicide attempt was intentional in her episode of Behind the Music. “I didn’t have any fight in me. I didn’t care about anything. I  just wanted out. At that moment, I wanted out, “she said. “I wanted it to be over with – all of it, all of that [expletive]. I just sat in the closet and looked at the mirror and took all the pills in the bottle. I wanted to go to sleep and just be at peace. I knew exactly what I was doing. You can’t accidentally take a whole bottle of pills.”

It’s only August 28, so the month isn’t over yet, and all of that happened in less than 30 days. Complexion is not the issue at all. Crazy knows no color. Fantasia gave us so much to talk about. Her antics were comparable to Britney Spears back in ’07. When someone acts crazily, we’re going to talk about how crazy and foolish they are.

If Fantasia wants to play big girl games, she has to accept the big girl consequences and understand our reaction to it. Scandal sells.

I just really had to comment on Kanye West’s video for his new song “Power.”  First let say that I love that Kanye’s back out because I was definitely wondering where he’s been. He wasn’t making the best choices, so maybe a break was necessary. Power is a good song but the video is a little creepy, in my opinion.

So the video just starts off with Kanye just staring you. The camera starts to pull back and you see more than what you excepted.  There’s women with horns and and men slowly leaping in the air to attack each other.  There is so much going in this video, I can’t even explain it all. Then on top of everything Kanye doesn’t move at all in the whole video. It just reminds me of a painting that’s slowly moving and you can’t stop staring at it.

This video was definitely not made to give people a happy feeling, especially since he only plays 1 minute and 43 seconds of the song itself then it’s just over. I would love to know what was going through Kanye’s head.

Anyway look for yourself.

Kanye West “Power”

There are a few celebs out there with Peter Pan syndrome. I don’t mean that they will never grow up and stay in childlike states for their whole lives, but these celebrities that I am about to mention have looked like they stayed the same age for their entire career. I mean, were they born middle aged? Will these stars ever look like their true age?

1. Morgan Freeman – He’s been old since The Electric Company. Lean on Me – he was old. Shawshank Redemption – old. This man does not age at all. Seriously. Does anyone even know his real age? Apparently he’s 73, but I need to see some proof.

2. Stacey Dash – She is the epitome of ageless beauty. When Clueless was released in 1995, she was almost 30 when she played teenager Dionne. Now, at 43 she is still gorgeous.

3. Meryl Streep – The two-time Oscar winner has barely changed since Kramer vs. Kramer in the 1980′s And the one thing I love about Meryl is that you can tell she hasn’t gotten hit with the Botox (at least not too much if has). We know from those smile lines that her life isn’t as Complicated as it seems.

4. Samuel L. Jackson

5. Jada Pinkett Smith

Wildcard: Angela Bassett - When she sat at Claire’s book club meeting on an episode of The Cosby Show, we can’t deny it, Angie was fly. She has her asymmetrical hairstyle and shoulder pads; she was pure 80′s perfection. What about those Oil of Olay commercials she was in a few years ago? She was flawless, I’m telling you, those cheekbones don’t lie. I just have one objection: she is eternally 35, so this means she shouldn’t be playing any teenagers. She played a teenager in What’s Love Got to Do With It, The Jacksons: An American Dream, and The Rosa Parks Story. Someone should have stopped her! I love you Angie, but nothing about you says 15. #FAIL

From The BVX – Can you feel the love? This weekend, three (yes, three!) different hip-hop couples tied the knot: Swizz Beatz and Alicia Keys, T.I. and Tameka “Tiny” Cottle and DJ Jazzy Jeff and Lynette Jackson. In celebration, TheBVX hatched 10 tips the happy couples should follow to maintain their marriages.
Congratulations, happy couples, and ’til death–or failing to follow these words of advice–do you part!

DO: Realize that being boyfriend and girlfriend is a lot different than being husband and wife-especially when you’re famous.

As a celebrity couple, when you’re hooking up all we really want to know is one thing: “OMG! How did it happen?” Bow Wow and Ciara? Nelly and Ashanti? Chris Brown and Rihanna? The same goes for all of them when they were dating. But now that you’re married? We want to know eeeeeverything. Why is T.I. making that face at Tiny? Why does Tiny always look angry? Why isn’t Alicia Keys on good terms with Swizz’s ex Mashonda? Why is Swizz dancing with those video chicks in his video? Why… why… why… why… why? If you thought the questions were bad when you were dating-wait ’til you see what the media’s got ready for you now!

DON’T: Read the tabloids. Or the blogs. Or Twitter. Or anything, really. Just stop reading all together.

Unless you want to read a million stories about how you and your spouse “broke up” last week, stay away from any story that involves you. We can pretty much guarantee you the news items won’t describe your wonderful trip to the movies, romantic dinner or stroll through the park. Those stories are reserved for dating couples. Now that you’re married, all the tabloids want are stories about-what else?-your inevitable divorce. Don’t feed into it.

DO: Keep SOME parts of your relationship private.

You don’t have to be Jay-Z and Beyonce private. You can actually, ya know, act like you know one another. But for the sake of your relationships, we probably don’t need to know that T.I. prefers boxers over briefs or that Alicia’s favorite bedroom tune is the “Ruff Ryders Anthem” (and, for the record: We made both those up, so don’t go spreading rumors people!). Keep that stuff to yourself and you’ll be just fine.

Read the rest at The BVX !